Walk By Faith

Lunch Date With My Big Boy...

2011-09-19T20:45:00.004-04:00

Check out the missing teeth.

Asa-isms: Part III

2011-04-29T21:18:00.003-04:00

Jim: Kids, we're going to play the quiet game. Let's see who can be quiet the longest.
{five seconds later...}
Asa: I'm winning.

Asa: I spy with my little eye something bald with a head.
Chloe: Is it daddy?
Asa: (shocked that she got it on the first try) You GUESSED it!!!

Wheels...

2011-04-21T00:11:00.006-04:00

Today, with very little help from Mommy, Asa learned how to ride a bike. I've never seen a child master a two-wheeler so quickly! He was so proud of himself and wants to spend all his time outside practicing his newly acquired skill!

Pool Pictures...

2011-04-08T09:42:00.004-04:00

Swimming in March & Locs Update...

2011-03-29T01:03:00.006-04:00

The boys have been spending a lot of time in the pool. I caught a quick picture and you can kind of see how long Asa's locs have gotten; stretched out, they are 3-4 inches.

Compared to this picture I took when we first started them late last summer...

He still loves them and can't wait until they are long enough to pull back with a rubber band. Even with the swimming, they are staying soft - he never has any type of breakage. We wash with conditioner once a week and mist with Palmer's Olive Oil Spray when I damp-towel rub them every other day (or so). The towel-rub method is all we've ever used and they are so uniform and neatly loc'd, even up to the scalp.

More Asa Quotes:

2011-01-28T10:07:00.003-05:00

Asa: It's dangerous to run in the road 'cause a car could squash you flat like a scarecrow.
Me: Scarecrows are flat?
Asa: Yes, if they get squashed by a car.

Asa: Mom, are you going to wear that?
Me: (in what I thought was a cute jogging suit) Yes, why?
Asa: Because I'll be embarrassed.
Me: WHY?
Asa: Because it looks like pajammies and people are going to laugh at you.

"Asa, what do you want for Christmas?"
"An iPad."

Four Years Ago...

2011-01-27T15:14:00.002-05:00

I heard God speak more clearly that I ever have in my life:

You must start now.

We had been planning to adopt from Haiti since 2000 and started gathering agency information in early 2006, but something was stopping us. It just hadn't been the right time. In late January of 2007, I stood in my foyer and yelled to my husband who was upstairs in his office, "It's time. We really have to start the adoption... now." He agreed and we didn't look back. We picked an agency in early February and this blog began.

I can't believe it's been four years. Crazy.

Hair!

2010-11-04T00:11:00.003-04:00

Just another update on Asa Mack's awesome hair. He's had his locs for over two months, and they really are growing out nicely. They're long enough to lay down pretty flat in the back, but the top is spikey and cute. He still loves them and gets especially excited when he watches football with daddy and sees all the big guys with long locs. We took these pictures when he was fresh out of the bath... squeaky-clean!

One Month...

2010-10-04T01:20:00.001-04:00

Hair Update...

2010-09-04T11:13:00.007-04:00

Week two of the little dreadlocs:

Week three:

Asa-isms...

2010-08-20T16:03:00.005-04:00

These are from the past few weeks. My all time favorite was his response to a stranger, though.

"I love my dad because he calls me son."

"I'm trying to wait for patience."

On vacation, having breakfast at the hotel...
Asa: Ally, if you keep talking to me about frogs, you'll make me sad.
Ally: What? I haven't been talking to you about frogs.
Asa: Yes you did. Just now.

Playing "Mother May I" in the pool with the kids (Asa had never played this before)...
Chloe: Mother, may I take two scissor steps?
Me: Yes you may.
Camden: Mother, may I take three baby steps?
Me: Yes you may.
Asa: Mother, may I have a muffin?

A Quick Update & Some News...

2010-08-16T16:24:00.006-04:00

We recently returned from a fantastic trip up north. Asa had a blast with his extended family and it still amazes me how quickly he's picked up on how everyone is related to one another. It's really neat because, up until last year, he didn't have any experience with grandparents, cousins, aunts or uncles.

We went to Gatlinburg and Asa got to see his first taffy-pulling machine! He also got to play in a cool mountain stream for the first time. Eventually, there won't be any more "firsts" but until then, I'll probably keep posting all the new things he experiences!

Also, our family is growing: Asa will have a new brother-in-law in March!!

Our beautiful daughter, Ally, is getting married and we are absolutely thrilled. God answered all the prayers we've always had for her future husband and we are so excited to see what the Lord has in store for this precious, young couple!

Even if they are still young, I think it is so important to pray for your children's future spouses. It's amazing to see how God honors those prayers and how they eventually come to fruition. It makes me wonder about the little girl that will someday be Asa's wife...

Asa's Baby Locs...

2010-08-13T13:54:00.005-04:00

Are super cute and he absolutely loves them. We've found a method that seems to be working really well and I'm excited about making this commitment to a style that fits his hair and personality so well!!

Attachment & Behavior Stuff...

2010-04-21T22:04:00.006-04:00

We've worked through so much over the past year and I feel like Asa has adjusted beautifully in so many areas. I really think that a tremendous amount of this growth is due to a very conscious effort on his part. That might sound crazy but, even at the tender age of four, I truly believe that he knows what we want for him (to feel loved and attached) and that he is trying to learn about being part of a family. This is sooooo encouraging and amazing to me because it's quite common to hear of adoptive parents who pour so much energy into the healing of their children, only to face rejection, opposition and defiance.

Before Asa came home, we read a lot and felt that we had a pretty good understanding of adoption and the attachment process. Until you are living it, though, it's very difficult to understand the subtle behavior nuances that indicate attachment issues. Someone who would interact with Asa (and other adopted kiddos) on a limited basis probably wouldn't even notice these traits, but we've become acutely aware of them and realize that his early years did have an impact on his little heart.

Despite the major advances Asa has made in self-control and obedience, we're still experiencing issues in public settings, particularly when I am trying to have conversations with other adults. It has totally stumped us in terms of why he feels so compelled to act out in this way; we thought it might have something to do with being in an orphanage and not having proper interpersonal skills or manners modeled by parents. But I recently happened upon an archived attachment article from Rainbowkids.com and this is the excerpt that grabbed me:

"Needs to control Mom at all times...
...disruptive when Mom is on the phone or talking to other adults, very jealous of attention to other siblings. Will whine, cling, hit, chatter, to monopolize Mom’s attention - again, insecure or anxious attachment." **

It says this can be a symptom of more serious attachment disorders, but my mommy instinct tells me that it's probably not that severe. I do think there is a broad spectrum of attachment issues and Asa probably falls into the "reconciling this new attachment and the feelings that go along with it" category. Maybe? I kind of made that up, but it seems to summarize where I think his little heart is right now. He's doing so well in many ways, but just has these remnants of life without a family embedded in his memory - and I can't even imagine what that must feel like for such a little guy. I've found some helpful info here and thought it might be useful for others (some of it doesn't apply or feel "right" to us, but a lot of it is practical and logical). It's always such a blessing to have the occasional a-ha! moment - - when I feel like I found a new tool or idea that might help our baby to heal.

** Recognizing Attachment Problems in Internationally Adopted Preschoolers

This Is What Happens...

2010-04-19T22:10:00.004-04:00

When Asa sees the camera:

Asa changed poses with each "click." You can tell, by Camden's unchanging expression, that this all took place within seconds. Asa hams it up without any prompting at all... what a goofball!

The both complied and smiled when daddy said "say cheese," though. :o)

Strangers...

2010-04-13T19:09:00.002-04:00

We've been diligent about explaining to Asa that he should not start conversations with strangers and that mommy and daddy will let him know when someone is a "friend" to whom we can talk. It used to be that Asa would act overly familiar (cheeky, even) with strangers. It was usually uncomfortable, not just for us, but the individual that caught Asa's attention. He's really been receptive to our guidance in this area and has gotten so much better. But this is what happened a few weeks ago while we were shopping for Easter clothes. He was standing next to me and practicing some dance moves and crazy faces in a mirror by a rack of dresses:

Lady: Hi there! You sure are cute... how old are you?
Asa: (loudly) You're a stranger. I can't talk to strangers.
Lady: Awww. You are adorable. That's true - you should not talk to strangers, but I'm a nice grandma and I love children.
Asa: (loud & indignant) MOM, that STRANGER is still talkin' to me!!

I think he'll eventually learn a bit more about tact (and volume control) but I'm pretty sure there is no restraining our Asa's effervescent personality.

One Year: The Good, The Bad & The Funny...

2010-03-26T23:00:00.005-04:00

This past year with our precious Asa has been filled with loads of joy and excitement, but also with some sadness and frustration. He's learned so much and has changed in many ways, but there are still reminders of the tiny little guy I met in Haiti two and a half years ago; he still has his super-kissable chubby cheeks and he still sucks on his lip when he's sleepy. We're so blessed that this sweet boy is part of our family. Here's a brief rundown of the past year...

The Good:

Asa is so smart. I am still amazed that he was born in a Third World country to a mother with no prenatal care, that he endured severe malnutrition and separation from his mama at 17 months, and that he lived in an orphanage for two years. It's a reasonable assumption that any combination of those factors would have caused some sort of developmental delay, but in terms of Asa's ability to retain information, comprehend concepts and express his thoughts, he just blows us away.

Asa is incredibly loving. He gives us unsolicited hugs, kisses and cuddles. He runs up to Jim and grabs his legs while saying, "You're the daddy! I love my daddy! You're BIG! Daddy is a good guy!" He has similar variations of that affirmation for everyone in the family (even Henry the Dog).

Asa went from the 5th percentile in height to the 50th in just nine months. That's seven inches!! Our pediatrician was amazed by his growth and his health.

He understands family relationships. He knows and explains who his parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts & uncles are - - even the ones who live across the ocean.

Asa seems to be attaching well. We were unapologetically rigid about the right kind of interaction with people outside of our family for quite some time. We were polite but firm about his need to be held, fed and comforted by us only and did our best to explain the reasons to people who were unfamiliar with adoption. We were still extremely social, so he was able to meet friends and family, but we tried to make sure he knew that they were not his parents. It was very clear from the beginning that Asa was "friendly" and could easily attach to anyone, so we know that this was the right decision; he's healing and growing because we are reinforcing the primary relationship he needs to have with us.

The Bad:

It's safe to say that Asa has had some serious control issues. He does not like to be corrected and will often do exactly what we tell him not to do. Some of this is willful, but some of his behaviors seem like compulsions over which he has little control. We are trying to decipher the two and respond accordingly. (Edit: I actually started writing this post on the anniversary of his homecoming a few weeks ago. Recently, though, he has been so incredibly cooperative most of the time - - maybe we've turned a corner?!?)

Asa does stuff at night when everyone else is asleep. "Stuff" is a loose term for: dumping fish food on the floor, painting with lotion, plunging the toilet, disassembling a remote, and making calls from my cell phone at 2:30 am. That's the short list. We're not sure if this is pent up curiosity or something more. (Another late edit: This is subsiding as well and his late-night escapades are now few and far between!)

Our (normally) sweet and laid back little guy goes bonkers in social settings. He just loses all self control when we are with groups of people - he starts yelling and doing cartwheels. He gets rough, loud, rude and does not respect boundaries. It can be very difficult and emotionally draining. Has anyone else experienced this? Please leave a comment if you have; I'd love to know how others deal with it.

**Please don't think that I'm implying that Asa is bad. What's bad is that my poor little boy has endured less than ideal situations that have injured his heart. These things are not good for him and I know that he probably feels more frustration than we do that his emotions/behaviors can seem out of his control. We want to give him the tools and help to learn self-control, respect and a healthy dependence on his mommy and daddy who love him.

The Funny:

Asa has more personality than any four year old I've ever met. His laugh is hysterical. He does crazy voices and has some wild dance moves. He break-dances to classical music. He taught himself how to do cartwheels (as mentioned above) so I think a tumbling class is in his future. When big sister, Ally, leaves the house, he reminds her to take her "I-Pawwwwd" (I-Pod). When Asa is getting hungry, he says "Mom, can you hear my tummy? It's time for lunch." We were walking through Ikea and some music came on. He said "You hear that? It sounds like the Jonas Brothers... but it's not. Because they don't live in Ikea." (We don't listen to Jonas Brothers music... he's maybe heard of them a handful of times on the Disney Channel.... he simply absorbs everything!!)

Three Years Ago...

2010-02-08T09:20:00.007-05:00

This blog began.

Two years ago, we were stuck in IBESR with no end in sight.

One year ago, our file was being submitted into immigration and we were anticipating Asa's arrival!

C4C Earthquake Relief...

2010-01-29T10:06:00.012-05:00

Wow! We were so blessed this week to be part of the Chances for Children family. Jim and I were able to see, firsthand, the awesome outpouring of generosity from C4C donors as we joined the team that helped to gather and pack food and supplies for the creche. Monday was spent shopping and hauling large quantities of supplies to the staging area at the Miami airport. On Tuesday, we organized and boxed everything (with the help of a sweet group of jr. highers from Orlando) so it would be ready to fly into the Dominican Republic. The plane left on Wednesday and we've been told that the trucks arrived at the creche in Haiti on Thursday where the supplies are already being put to use! Praise the LORD for its safe arrival!

This is just a portion of the items purchased from Costco.

Most of our group (Jim was taking the picture).

Jim at WalMart; we left with six very full carts and lots of strange looks from passers by.

Some of the supplies being delivered to the loading dock at the airport. The crew at International Bonded Couriers were a delight; so helpful and considerate!

Me with a portion of the 200+ HANDMADE cloth diapers that were lovingly sewn by my super-sweet friends from our Bible Fellowship class at church.

April with loads of medicine from another C4C adoptive family!

Jim, taking inventory for the plane's manifest.

This was only part of the load - there were also a bunch of pallets that contained rice, charcoal, food, bleach, etc....
7,300 pounds in all made it to the creche!

Mesi Anpil (thank you so much) to everyone who donated!

Sometimes I Wonder...

2010-01-19T12:09:00.007-05:00

Why one million orphans wasn't a big enough number for people to notice before the earthquake. Even before this horrifying catastrophe, it was estimated that around one million children in Haiti were either orphaned or abandoned. It's encouraging to see the support and generosity pouring into Haiti but it breaks my heart that it took the tragic deaths of hundreds of thousands to bring attention to a country that was already poverty-stricken and desperate.

The adoption process in Haiti was averaging around two years, with some people waiting over three years to bring their children home. Many of the orphanages were always short on food. There was no rhyme or reason to the arbitrary laws that would come and go throughout the process. Adoptive families were waiting for the children (with whom they had visited and bonded) for an unnecessary amount of time and there were instances when children, who were legally adopted by Americans, were denied visas by the US to come home to their families. People in the Haitian adoption community have been signing petitions and calling their representatives for years about these issues. Fortunately, it sounds like the children in process have been granted emergency visas so they can come home to their already waiting families and, finally, there is an awareness about Haiti's orphan problem. How I wish this could have happened apart from tragedy.

I've gotten a lot of e-mails asking how to start the process of adopting from Haiti (and I've heard that many other adoptive families have, as well). I'm so happy people are considering adoption but, again, heartbroken that it took a tragedy to open people's eyes to the need. I really don't know what will become of Haitian adoptions and when/how they will resume. The newly orphaned children certainly won't be adoptable for a very long time without documentation of abandonment, relinquishment or parent's death certificates, which is as it should be; placement with their own family members is always preferred to adoption. It seems like many of the government buildings were destroyed, so that definitely complicates things, even for waiting children. When some sort of stability returns, I would hope that the ridiculous laws would be amended, allowing a broader scope of people to adopt. Right now (because of UNICEF) the parameters are narrow and restrictive. We'll just continue to pray and advocate for orphans.

Please continue to give and pray!! Chances for Children still needs supplies. World Vision and Compassion are also some wonderful organizations that were already working diligently in Haiti - you can give a one time gift or a long term sponsorship of a child. Heartline is another wonderful ministry and you can read first-hand accounts of the reality in Haiti right now by clicking the Livesay Web Log link in the adoptive families column. And even when this tragedy is no longer receiving 24 hour coverage, please remember that Haiti is still the poorest country in the Western Hemisphere and that there are 143 million orphans worldwide.

In the Midst of Such Sorrow...

2010-01-15T11:15:00.007-05:00

We experienced a bit of joy yesterday as we officially domesticated Asa's adoption. This basically means that, even though he was already legally our son, we now have US records of his adoption and he'll receive (what amounts to) a Florida birth certificate. He was such a good boy and loves the big bear given to him by the judge.

I know lots of my blog friends have adopted (or are in the process of adopting) from other orphanages. I pray that your organizations receive the help they need and that, somehow, adoptions are expedited to get the children out of such a dangerous situation. Word from Asa's creche is not good. The children are uninjured (praise the LORD) but the building did sustain some damage and they are running critically low on supplies and food. A large container with six months worth of food was stuck in customs before the earthquake and has now, most likely, been looted. For anyone who happens to read this and is not affiliated with another organization, Chances for Children is definitely in need of funds and any donation you can make is greatly appreciated. There is a button to donate right on their website and you can even decide how your contribution will be utilized. Thank you so much! Please continue to pray without ceasing!

As 2009 Ends...

2009-12-30T12:45:00.004-05:00

Asa has been home for nearly ten months! The past few have been a whirlwind of activity; Asa made his first trip up north (brrrr!) and celebrated his first birthday and Christmas with us. I have so much to share and hope to do some specific posts on bonding, attachment and some other adoption related stuff. For now, though, I'll just share the Christmas picture of our wonderful kiddos:

Reunion Recap...

2009-09-28T23:43:00.016-04:00

From Haiti With Love:
Chances for Children's First Family Reunion

I designed the t-shirts!

We arrived in Ft. Lauderdale on Friday afternoon. The kids were ready to hop right into the pool where a few other children from the creche were already swimming.

All the children who had come home from the Crèche Enfant de l’Jèsus seemed excited to see one another & play together, and the children who had never met before hit it off right away, as well! They all played on the beach playground and swung each other in the hammocks - it was really neat to see friendships renewed and new bonds created. We were able to spend time with some great friends that I had met on trips to Haiti, and some that we've only met via the internet.

This is our Ally (17) with a very smiley Asa.

Saturday morning included breakfast for the group with a touching video of the children before and after coming home. There were planned activities for the children throughout most of the afternoon: Haitian crafts, language lessons, music and games.

Chloe (8) and Asa loved playing games with the other children.

The event ended on Saturday evening with a lovely outdoor dinner.

We headed back home Sunday morning after thoroughly enjoying the memorable weekend. We're so grateful to C4C for organizing and hosting such and important event and we look forward to staying connected through future reunions!

C4C Family Reunion!!!

2009-09-22T22:30:00.002-04:00

One totally amazing event that we're getting ready to attend is the first ever Chances for Children family reunion!! Many families who adopted through C4C, along with their children from Asa's orphanage (and some of the staff from Haiti) will be in Ft. Lauderdale this weekend. We're so excited that Asa will get to see old friends, and we're thrilled to spend time with other families we've gotten to know over the past two years. It's taking place at a lovely resort on the beach so we'll return with lots of great pictures.

We've been talking about it with Asa - preparing him to see friends and former caretakers. I'm curious to see how he'll react. This truly is a great opportunity for him to stay connected with other children who share a similar past, and I really hope we can keep them in touch with one another as the years pass...

6+ Months and a Long Update...

2009-09-21T12:07:00.008-04:00

Asa has been home for more than half of a year. We continue to be amazed by his language acquisition, his empathy for others, his resilience, and just how well he's adjusted to life with our family here in America. Asa is a typical preschooler in many ways. He is very curious and loves learning new things. He's cuddly and affectionate. He can sometimes be mischievous and, occasionally, even naughty. ;o)

Most of all, he's happy, healthy and very loved by all of us. We do have some challenges, though. Many of the initial issues we faced (sleep disturbances, indiscriminate affection toward strangers, etc...) have mostly resolved themselves and aren't quite as monumental as they felt four or five months ago.

There are a few areas in which Asa still needs a little extra guidance. So much of what he experiences in a family is different than anything he encountered at the orphanage. One thing he's learning is that he has his very own possessions; his clothes, shoes, toothbrush and some special toys are just for Asa - and he doesn't have to share them! That also means that his big sister's make-up and his daddy's laptop do not belong to him. We've had some issues with Asa getting into things and, since he really didn't have much experience with how certain items work or are meant to be used, he just didn't know not to use Ally's make-up for paint. This concept is taking a while for him to grasp but we do our best to patiently correct and teach him respect for property.

Asa doesn't have the severe food hoarding issues that some children coming from institutional settings might have. But we've found that, even after he's eaten and is clearly satisfied, he tends to fixate on the leftovers that others have on their plates. We try to clear the table off quickly because he will repeatedly ask everyone for whatever they haven't eaten. We're trying to establish healthy eating habits for him; nutritious snacks are offered (and happily accepted) between meals so Asa knows that he'll always have his needs met.

I've found that Asa's behavior spirals downward quickly if he is corrected for misbehaving. It's very cyclical in nature. He tends to hold onto resentment after being disciplined and you can see in his face that he's stewing over it and will act out later because of it. I'm not sure if this is just his personality (although it's very different from anything I've seen in the many three year olds with whom I've spent time) or if it's a remnant of something deeper... before his life with our family. It breaks my heart to see such a small child with these complex emotions - it often feels like he's much older than he really is. I know there are many facets to his personality that have been impacted by the separation from his birth mother at 17 months old, and the nearly two years he spent in an orphanage. I mourn the time he was without a family and am so angry at the horrible system which kept him from our family for an unreasonable amount of time. It hurts me to know that I might never know what my child experienced before he was in my home and what lingering difficulties he might have. We're just continuing to trust that God's grace is sufficient to heal Asa's heart and we pray for wisdom and patience so we can help in that process.

I have to say that we are so blessed by Asa's capacity for love. He tells everyone in the family that he loves us multiple times throughout the day (even Henry the Dog). And I really believe he feels it and means it. Equally important is the fact that he accepts and delights in the love he receives from us. At the six month mark, I really think this is a solid foundation upon which everything else will be built. He knows we are his family and he knows he is loved!!

Asa: Singer/Songwriter

2009-09-06T22:28:00.003-04:00

He LOVES playing on the piano!

Our Little Tadpole...

2009-08-04T16:51:00.002-04:00

He LOVES swimming and he's getting to be so good at it! He can even dive about 5 feet down for rings!

Sorry for the weird camera angle; I was using the laptop and couldn't see what I was filming. ;o)

Lazy Siesta Key...

2009-08-03T20:42:00.003-04:00

I cherish our time there. In 2007, I dreamed about the day Asa would be with us; we had recently accepted his referral and even mailed off our dossier from the FexEx location right off the island. So it was with great JOY that we were finally able to make our first trip with Ace. Here are some pictures from our time on the beach, the boat and around the island...

4+ Months Home...

2009-07-17T11:53:00.000-04:00

And things just seem so normal, that it feels weird to be writing an update. Asa's adjustment has been miraculous, considering the dramatic way in which his life has changed; he has remained a relatively mellow, happy and go-with-the-flow kind of kiddo. There are areas in which we remain vigilant, just to insure that he is bonding properly, but most days pass without any major surprises. His English just blows us away and he communicates effortlessly. Asa does (occasionally) test boundaries but responds well when we explain rules and model good behavior. He's now sleeping through the night (YES!!) and naps really well every day. There's been a little bit of regression with the potty (just as a heads up for other adoptive parents - I've heard it's common) but it's not too big of a deal.

Here's a little rundown of what's been going on this summer:

We were SO blessed, over Father's Day weekend, so see my brother, sister-in-law and nephew, Grayson. They moved to Amsterdam last fall and we thought that we wouldn't be seeing them until their furlough, sometime next year. But they were able to make a quick trip the the States and came to Florida to see us!! This was really special because they got to meet Asa for the first time. We did a lot of swimming and the kids had fun playing with little Grayson. I didn't have the foresight to get a picture of all the grandkids together before Allyson left for church camp (bummer). But I did get this one of the littles together....

Asa got to experience his first week of Vacation Bible School. He was so excited about getting up every morning and dressing in the theme color for each day. I helped teach the three year old class, so he wasn't apart from me at all, but it was good to see him participate and interact with other children his age (he's still staying with us for church every Sunday). He did pretty well, overall, but it's clear that he enjoys being a little bit of a class clown.

Asa can swim now. Really and truly swim: underwater, above water, treading water, etc.... All without any floaty devices. It was my goal to have him swimming by the end of summer but he totally took to it with no fear and a very strong desire to do what the other kids were doing. The cutest thing is to look at him underwater while he swims - he has his eyes wide open and sticks his little tongue out while he does a unique, froggy-style stroke!

What's so funny is how Asa just knows how things work around here. If he has a snack at the table and needs to make a quick potty break, he pushes his plate to the middle of the table so a particular golden retriever won't walk by and swipe it. He even says "Mama, watch my food. Henry, don't get Asa's food," (yes, he's still mostly referring to himself in third person but is starting to say "I" and "me" occasionally). When he hears the garage door open, he's always the first one to say "Daddy's home!" and runs to the door to greet him. He knows all the family members with whom we skype and even asks to talk to them, by name. He plays so nicely and always cleans up after himself. His favorites toys right now are: Tinker Toys, Legos, and Matchbox cars. He knows exactly what things annoy each of his siblings and makes sure to do those things at least once a day. He tattles (both funny and annoying).

Tomorrow, we're off for a week on the beach. I'll definitely be back with pictures!

Fun With Pronouns

2009-06-16T14:16:00.003-04:00

Asa calls himself Asa. He doesn't use "I" or "me" yet. Jim's attempt to teach him "I" sounded a bit like the Who's on First routine.

ASA: Asa wants more.
PAPA: Asa, say "I want more."
ASA: Papa wants more.
PAPA: (cracking up) Nooooo. Not me... you. Say "I want more."
ASA: You want more.
CAMDEN: (chimes in) Asa, don't say "Asa," just say "I want more."
ASA: Camden wants more.

Then, we had this exchange in the pool today.

ASA: Asa is a dolphin.
MOMMY: Asa, can you say "I am a dolphin?"
ASA: Mommy is a dolphin!

I knew where it was going and just gave up.... I was laughing too hard.

Our Son...

2009-06-09T21:00:00.000-04:00

Says "Mama, mama.... ummmm, mama? Mama! Mama..." before he tells me anything. Even if I'm looking right at him and he has my full attention, he must say "mama" no less than eight times before telling me what he wants to say. Very cute. Usually.
Asks "What's this?" or "What's that?" when he sees anything he can't verbally identify in English. Once we tell him, he repeats it once and often remembers a few days later.
Separates phrases with "ummmm...." [then smacks his lips] when telling us long stories.
Asks "What'dya doin?" when he wonders what we're doing. Or, when it's obvious what we're doing, he still asks like this, "What'dya doin mom? Cookin?" which is super adorable.

We've Been Busy...

2009-06-08T21:00:00.000-04:00

Which is my lame excuse for the lack of blogging. May kept us occupied - we were finishing our homeschool year with the bigger kids and watching in amazement as Asa's English exploded. By the end of the month, school was over and we had an incredibly verbal little three year old... it was the perfect time for a week long vacation in Orlando.

[asa, as we were packing for the trip]

We explained to Asa that we'd be going on a trip and that we'd come back home when it was over. He went with me to drop Henry the Dog off at the doggie hotel and seemed to understand that it was a temporary arrangement. He pointed at his canine buddy and said, "Henry, stay here. We be back laaaaater."

[walking and sweating in magic kingdom]

Asa already had a little bit of exposure to Disney World. My birthday was in late April and Jim, being the thoughtful hubby he is, got our family annual Disney passes as my gift. We had done a few day trips to Epcot to go on the "Big ball ride" and Magic Kingdom to see "Dickey Mouse" (???) but we were really excited about one full week at a condo only three minutes from the parks. We went to all four parks; Asa saw his first real zoo-type animals in Animal Kingdom and learned about the afternoon summer downpours at Hollywood Studios.

[asa loves buzz]

Our condo had a few fun swimming pools in which we passed a lot of the time, too. We've been teaching Asa how to swim here at home and people at the pools were shocked by how well such a tiny little guy swims underwater. He's our tadpole!

[matching suits for the boys... of course]

[asa dives right in... with mommy nearby]

We all had such a nice time and it was a great way to start the summer. Asa loved the "becation" and I think it was a really good opportunity to teach permanence. His family stayed together even though we weren't in a familiar environment, our home was here and the same when we returned and, as promised, Henry Dog was happily reunited with us.

[konked out in his king size bed at the condo]

We've experienced so much with Asa in his three months here at home. I'll definitely be discussing all the highs (many) and lows (a few) in a future post.

Asa's Been Home For TWO MONTHS!

2009-05-09T22:49:00.004-04:00

Wow. It's just so hard to believe. We are blessed beyond measure; Asa is such an adorable, funny, polite, happy and smart little boy. He's doing so well. Asa learns so much every day, but it already feels like he's always been here. We have a nice routine with sleep, meals, playtime, etc... He loves to tell us what's going to happen next and the way things work. His favorite phrase right now is an-nen (which means "and then"). It's usually used like this, "Asa eats, an-nen nap," or "Get bathing suit, an-nen jump in pool, an-nen hair wet." His English just astounds us - he'll remember a word he heard once (days before) and will use it in the right context. His easy-going personality makes outings or slight variations in our schedule very pleasant - he takes everything in stride.

I had mentioned that we were having some sleep issues and those have seemed to subside. Asa is going to bed without much fuss and usually wakes once in the middle of the night to use the potty, but generally goes right back to sleep. He can still be a little too friendly with strangers, sometimes, but that's getting better, also. Since he understands so much English, we've been able to talk about family: "We hug people in our family: Daddy, Mommy, Ally, Chloe and Camden. We can give high-fives or wave at friends." The cutest thing is how he'll high-five a friend and church, then turn and whisper in my ear "Mommy, high-fibe fwend."

As for the rest of us... everyone in the family just wants to eat him up. Cam and Chloe never tire of kissing his cheeks, Ally loves to cuddle him, Daddy gives giant bear hugs and I nibble on his little feet (piddy toes in Asa-speak) every chance I get. It's a miracle he's not sick of us, yet. Asa seems to feel secure; he is growing and thriving. We're so grateful that God chose us to be his parents.

Mommy and Asa

Brothers...

2009-04-26T21:47:00.006-04:00

I just love dressing them all "matchy."

Sand And Sun...

2009-04-26T21:32:00.004-04:00

We made another trip to the beach last week when Mamaw (my mom) was visiting. It was windy and cloudy but Asa had so much fun in the sand with daddy...

And Asa LOVES the pool! He wears a floaty-suit (just like all the other kids did as toddlers) but we think he'll be swimming by the end of summer. He watched the bigger kids hold their breath, so he did it, too. He watched daddy toss the other kids in and he asked to be tossed too. Once we finish homeschooling for the year (in the next few weeks) I think we'll be living out back in the pool.

The Scary Monster...

2009-04-25T08:00:00.002-04:00

Becomes Asa's trusted companion.

An Update:

2009-04-24T09:02:00.004-04:00

Asa has been home for seven weeks. His adjustment really has been miraculous.

Language: His English is fantastic, but we're still keeping some of his Kreyòl words (even though he knows their English counterparts) simply because they are cute, and even the other kids enjoy saying them. There were a few Kreyòl words and phrases that he was still using consistently, and we weren't quite sure what they meant, but our friends from Haiti helped us out and now we know! I know that so many children adopted from other countries actually end up rejecting their native language, but we really do hope to keep him connected with the Haitian-American community here so he might retain some of it. For the most part, we all understand each other and here are a few of the cutest phrases with which Asa has surprised us...

"Papa bear shoe, bank you!"
He was telling me that daddy put the shoe on his bear and he told daddy 'thank you.'

"Henry! Chicken! Eat it!!"
Henry got a toy chick that was in Asa's Easter basket and had run off with it in his mouth. Asa was alerting us to the situation.

Also, we had run out of toilet paper in a bathroom and Asa wanted to know where we could get some more. I said, "Come on, I'll show you." He responded, "Show ME!" Awesome pronoun use, buddy!!

Behavior: For the most part, Asa is a sweet and compliant little guy. He loves to learn and he wants to be good. He responds so well to praise for good behavior and we've found that positive encouragement goes a long way. He does need to be supervised 100% of his waking hours, though. If he gets away for even a minute or two, we've found pencil drawings on the wall, handfuls of Q-tips flushed down the toilet and purse contents dumped. Occasionally, there will be some defiance that seems quite intentional - especially when he doesn't feel he's getting attention when he wants it (i.e. when we're all busy getting ready for church or if I'm on the phone). Some days he's extra clingy and just wants to be held for hours - if it seems like a genuine need to be reassured of our love and that we are his permanent family, we meet that need.

Sleep: Hahaha. No comment. Actually, for transparency's sake and because I think this might be helpful for other adoptive parents, I'll share. We have yet to get into a consistent sleep mode despite our very consistent routine and bed time. He only woke once last night which was heavenly but the previous two weeks were a bit rough. He was waking 3-4 times a night. I try not to get too worked up about it and I know it's simply a phase (just like when the other three seemed to want to nurse all night long as babies). It'll pass.

Attachment: Asa is clearly very attached to all of us. We do have to be careful about close contact with others because he has tried to reach out and hug anyone who shows interest in him. It's so difficult to tell people that we can't allow hugs or kisses yet because his primary bond to his parents must be secure before he branches out to other relationships. Without a lengthy explanation, it might come across to them as if we are being paranoid or overly protective but, after all the research and recommendations from our social workers, we know that we have to continue to stay the course and be very intentional about this. Asa does know what people make up our family and even seems to understand extended family like aunts, uncles and grandparents.

And it's true... just like the pain of childbirth is forgotten (even 31 hours of unmedicated labor!) the pain of a two year adoption process is quickly fading. I remember the emotions but can't feel them any more. Asa's here and we feel nothing but blessed! Look at this adorable little guy...

Spring In Florida {Alternate Title: Beach Baby}

2009-04-06T15:36:00.007-04:00

Asa belongs in Florida, for sure. He enjoys being outside and we've taken advantage of the amazing weather over the past few weeks. We spent most of Saturday on Ft. Desoto Beach - riding bikes, picnicking and swimming. Asa absolutely loves the bike cart (incidentally, we took an 11 mile ride last week!) but we found one thing he just might like even better. THE BEACH!!

One family member was conspicuously absent from this trip. Allyson (16) is spending her third spring break on a mission trip in Brazil. :o)

"Bank You, Mommmmmmy"

2009-03-30T22:32:00.003-04:00

I hear this no less that 50 times a day. It is absolutely precious. Asa is a very grateful little boy. According to the woman who acts as the live-in manager at the creche, Asa would say thank you to his aunties and caretakers all the time - - when they would help him with buttons, give him food or tie his shoes. When he first came home, he'd say "Mesi Mama" (and still does, sometimes). He has transitioned to the adorable and very dramatic "Bank you, mommmy!" which melts my heart! We try to model gratitude with all of our children since it's just such an important character trait. I'm so happy that our little Asa takes such joy in giving thanks! He loves to thank God in his prayers, too. His bedtime prayer is usually pretty long and fervent, includes some singing, names of children from the creche and some other things I'm not quite sure of. But this is what he says before breakfast, lunch and dinner:

"Bank you, God for cee-ee-al (cereal... Rice Krispies to be precise),
for Papa,
Mama,
Ally,
Klo-eeee,
Can-den,
Ahn-ry (Henry the dog, they are best friends now)
and Asa Mackenley.
De De-dus name (in Jesus name)
AMEN!"

What a cutie pie. I want to eat him up!! And in other news... Asa hasn't had any of the crying spells that had been common, initially. He is responding well to correction; instead of "disconnecting" and looking away, he makes eye contact and seems eager to understand what we're trying to tell him. And bedtime has been a joy the past two nights. Tonight was hilarious because he kept yelling to Camden (long after Cam had been asleep) "Can-den... I love YOU. Can-den! Can-den! I loooooove yooooou!" Yeah. It made me cry.

It's Hard To Believe...

2009-03-28T22:10:00.004-04:00

That Asa has been home for three weeks! There were times when it seemed impossible to even fathom him actually being with us. And, yet, here he is - sleeping soundly, tucked into his bed in the room above me. Wow.

Over the past two years, this has been a journal about the process, the wait, the frustration and the joy of a Haitian adoption. Now that Asa is home, I hope to give a really honest and accurate picture of our transition in the hopes that it may offer encouragement and insight to other adoptive parents. Many of our experiences might be unique to our own family and child, but there will certainly be some common issues we'll share with other parents of children coming home from an institutional (more specifically, a Haitian orphanage) setting. So....

Right now, things are going really well. By "well" I mean that we have not been especially surprised by any of Asa's behavior, and his adjustment seems to be similar to what we've researched and heard about from other parents. That doesn't mean that we don't have tough moments. But we feel prepared (at least moderately) for the times when Asa feels sad or tests boundaries or acts out. If pressed, I would say that, right now, Asa is joyful, engaging, funny, and cuddly 80% of the time. The other 20% can range from sulky and sullen to sad, angry and maybe even confused. Yes, most of those things are typical for any three year old. But, sometimes, there is unique element; it feels like there is something coming from a place inside him that is quite different from a child who had been parented in a family since birth. And that's the reality which I hope to convey.

Ironically, I wasn't sure what I'd touch on, first (there's so much to write about). But just as I was finishing the above paragraph, I heard the cries of my tiny, little guy coming from upstairs. A few minutes of cuddling did the trick, but I expect to be up there again in another few hours. After about two weeks of sleeping pretty well, Asa began waking up more often though the night. It was normal for him to wake once to use the potty, but he'd usually go right back to sleep. Now, he's waking three or four times a night and the result is that I'll just stay with him in his bed until morning, because he really seems to need the reassurance that I'm there. He wants my arm under his head and he usually maintains a firm grip on me (even in his sleep). This makes for a slightly sleepy & sore mommy in the mornings, but I absolutely believe this is teaching him that we will always meet his needs. Right now, his "need" is to know that he is not alone (just like a newborn who cries at night). It's a lot like "musical beds" at our house these days, because Camden (age five) often opts sleep with Asa on the bottom bunk instead of sleeping in his, up top. So when Asa cries, Camden moves out and I move in. And this works for us, for now. I'm sure it will be one of many phases through which Asa must pass to ultimately feel safe and secure in our family.

Potty Time Fun...

2009-03-26T10:50:00.001-04:00

Head, Shoulders, Knees AND TOES!

(and toilet paper with a French accent)

Build-A-Bear

2009-03-24T10:32:00.004-04:00

This activity was mostly planned as a special treat for Chloe and Camden. When we started the adoption process (before even being matched with Asa) the kids were told that when their new brother came home, they'd all get to build their own bear. Asa didn't really know what to think, but he watched the bigger kids and joined in.

Allyson is a little big for bears, now, so she took pictures and

helped the kids choose their animals.

Asa was fond of the krapo (frog) but eventually decided
on a bear like Camden.

He took the "stuffing" job very seriously.

Everyone had a really nice time.
Daddy even got to spend some time in the Mac store,
so it was a treat for him, too!

Family Pictures...

2009-03-23T15:02:00.004-04:00

First Family Photo:

Asa isn't a fan of having his picture taken. It's not often that we'll get a smiling shot unless he isn't aware of the camera. So these grumpy faces don't really represent the goofy, happy little guy who runs around the house singing all day.

Not Much Time...

2009-03-13T21:39:00.004-04:00

To update the blog anymore - - it's busy around here! But the kids are in bed, so I can share a little bit about our magnificent trip and how things have been going since Asa has been home.

Jim and I left our house around 3:00pm last Wednesday. The ride to Miami was nice & quiet (we're rarely in the car alone together) so we had plenty of time to just enjoy each other's company. Once in Miami, we checked into our hotel and had a nice dinner date. It was hard to sleep, though, because we were so excited!! We got up early the next morning, headed to the airport and met our sweet travel companions (they were picking up their little boy, too).

An aside: If you are headed to Haiti to bring home your child/ren, travel AIR FRANCE!!! This was, hands down, the best experience I've ever had on a plane. Their rates were less than AA, the planes were new & nice, they served meals and walked the aisle with a basket of toys for children! Awesome!! I could go on and on about how amazing they were. But I won't. Do check them out, though.

We arrived around noon on Thursday and the airport didn't seem nearly as chaotic as it normally does. Retrieving our baggage was quick and easy and our ride out to the creche was uneventful. It was Jim's first trip, though, so he was amazed by every aspect of being in Haiti. Pulling onto the grounds of the creche is always such a cool feeling. It's so beautiful and lush, and you can hear the sounds of the children inside. The little ones all came up to the door as our truck pulled up. Little Asa ran right to daddy and they had so much fun together. We were able to spend time out in the yard, playing soccer and frisbee with some of the older children. Since Asa was coming home with us, he was able to sleep in our room - which was so nice. He was finally all ours.

We knew that Friday would be a short day at the creche. We spent time down the road at the village school and, then, back at the creche where Asa had preschool. After a light lunch, we packed up, said goodbye to the aunties/staff and headed back into Port Au Prince. One very special part of our trip was the fact that we were able to meet Asa's birth mother. I feel like the meeting went very well and, while we'll keep most of the details private for Asa, I will say that meeting her was a memory I will always treasure. I'm confident that she loves him deeply and that she knows we do, as well.

We arrived at the airport early, had time to check in and then sit upstairs in the little cafe. Their toasty ham & cheese sandwiches on baguettes are the BEST, especially with coke in a glass bottle! We were amazed at how well Asa handled the new environment. He had a hotdog and some juice, then spent time coloring. We could tell he was getting drowsy as we were getting ready to board. He fell asleep before take-off and missed all the cool toys & activities that the lovely Air France flight attendant gave us. I woke him up before we landed so he could use the potty but he went right back to sleep and totally missed the landing, too.

Asa woke up as we were riding on the moving sidewalks and he was ALL SMILES. Again, not at all phased by all the new sights and sounds. Immigration in Miami was a breeze. They were so nice and processed us (along with the wonderful couple with whom we traveled) in a matter of 15 minutes or so. We got our bags, took another potty break and headed to our car which was waiting in the parking garage! Asa loves our big, red machine. He wasn't so sure about the carseat at first, but with a tiny bit of encouragement, he got right in. We knew it would be too late to head all the way home to Tampa, but did want to get a little head start. Asa seemed fine in the car so we drove across Alligator Alley and spent the night at a hotel in Naples. It was so cute to see Asa under the fluffy, white duvet.

Saturday morning started with Asa's first warm bath... he LOVED it! We had a wonderful breakfast together (Asa thoroughly enjoys scrambled eggs!) before traveling the final leg of our trip. Within two hours, we were pulling up to our house and were greeted by three of the happiest kiddos ever! Asa was timid at first, but warmed up to his siblings after Camden brought him some big Tonka trucks. He was a total chatterbox within hours.

We are amazed at all the songs he knows... and his ABC's... and his numbers - all in English! Teacher Jean (at the creche) has done a fabulous job of preparing the kids for coming home to their English speaking homes. Asa does speak a ton of Creole, too, which is so precious. I understand a lot of what he's saying and the kids are even starting to pick up some Creole.

The first few days went so smoothly. Asa was taking naps and sleeping really well. He would play happily, but was also very content to just be held by mama & papa. On Tuesday, though, he became more anxious at nap and bedtime. He cries a really sad cry that Chloe says reminds her of a baby tiger. So we hug, cuddle, comfort & rock him, and it seems like he might be feeling a little more at ease; he calms down quicker and wakes up happy. He and the dog aren't best friends.... yet. But we've made progress; Asa no longer shrieks when he sees the dog and our sweet golden, Henry, is really good about just avoiding the new little family member. He's really gentle and intuitive like that.

Every day is full of fun, new firsts for Asa. But we can also sense a little bit of sadness and loss. I'm sure he misses his friends, caretakers and the routine of the creche. It's all he's ever known. The wonderful news is the sad moments are fleeting and his happiness & joy light up the house. Asa seems to really be bonding to us really well; he makes wonderful eye contact, comes to us for comfort and seems to sense how much we love to meet his needs. It's been an exhausting, overwhelming and AMAZING week!

Some Pictures From The Trip...

2009-03-11T14:24:00.003-04:00

Jim holding Asa for the first time.

Lunch at the creche.

Getting ready to go!

At the Port Au Prince airport.

Papa and Asa

2009-03-09T16:25:00.002-04:00

Are so cute together! When we first arrived at the creche, I told Jim that he should be the first to hold Asa since I've visited four times and Jim had never been before. When we pulled up to the creche, the two and three year olds ran up to the door. I had a feeling Asa would know Jim from all the pictures over his bed.... and he DID! He ran right into the arms of his big, bald, tearful daddy! They have really bonded well and Jim knows just how to make Asa (Asa Mack, Big Mack, etc...) laugh hysterically.

Today is our third day home and Asa is doing SO WELL! He is very talkative, happy and seems to take everything in stride (except the dog, and we're working on that). The kids are having a blast with him and they've come up with so many games to play together. Asa is learning and retaining quite a bit of English, already, and everyone loves his adorable accent. More pics, trip details and video to come....

We're Home...

2009-03-07T22:32:00.002-05:00

I promise to post pictures and details soon. For now, I'll share that everything has gone beautifully and every aspect of the trip seemed to just be covered in grace. Asa is amazing and we're in awe...

He's Coming Home!!!

2009-02-27T12:19:00.006-05:00

Our whole family will be together next Saturday! The travel dates have been confirmed; Jim and I will head to Miami on Wednesday, fly to Haiti on Thursday morning and return to Miami with Asa Mackenley on Friday evening!! We'll stay there that night - - an evening alone together in the hotel will give us some time to rest and bond before driving back to our home on the Gulf Coast Saturday morning. We can't believe it's finally happening!

It Gets Better (Kind Of)...

2009-02-21T13:52:00.002-05:00

I checked my e-mail this morning to find that Asa's visa was actually printed YESTERDAY!!! We don't need anything else. Not a single thing. We are DONE. The relief is indescribable. But... we won't be able to travel next week due to Carnival. It looks like we'll be heading down the first week of March.

We Interrupt This Blog...

2009-02-19T19:04:00.002-05:00

To announce that Asa's visa was approved at an appointment which took place this morning! However, much of Haiti (including the US Consulate) closes to celebrate Carnival, so the actual visa probably won't be in-hand until later next week. I can't say for sure, but my best guess is that we will probably travel late next week or early the following week.

The extremely speedy visa appointment came as a complete shock. Praise the LORD, our son is coming home!!!

USCIS APPROVAL!!!

2009-02-17T18:05:00.003-05:00

Asa now has immigration approval and our file is being sent to the consulate for a visa appointment. This should happen within the next week and the actual visa should be in hand a few days after that. We haven't received any word on travel dates. I'll be able to update a little more when I'm no longer in shock.

Missing My Littlest Valentine...

2009-02-14T00:01:00.002-05:00

And wishing I could give him a HUGE smooch on his adorable face!!

Our file has been in the US immigration office for one work week. After two years, it's hard to believe we're really and truly down to the final step. We simply need our country to approve our son for a visa, then issue the visa. Praying, praying, praying....

Monthly Update Photo...

2009-02-09T14:09:00.004-05:00

We're praying that the visa is approved QUICKLY! This precious little guy needs to come home!

This Is Not "The" News...

2009-02-08T00:00:00.001-05:00

I've been waiting to post - but it is some news. We found out that our file will probably be submitted to the US immigration office tomorrow. We had really hoped it was already there but it was good to just get an update with some concrete information.

We are SO ready for our Asa to be home. His room has been ready for over a year so we haven't had to do much in that area. I've slowly been buying clothes and, when I picked a toothbrush for him, it totally made my day. Asa now has jammies to match Chloe and Camden (thank you, Erika!!) and a bag of gifts sits on the dresser from his friend Mya, who came home from the creche in December (thank you, Laura!!). My bags are filling up with donations for the orphanage from lots of generous people (like "multi-purpose ointment" from Mike & Tifanni - thank you!!). Now all we need is immigration approval, a visa and a travel date.

Also, the blog turns two years old today. Wow.

Well...

2009-01-30T13:39:00.003-05:00

I'm not sure how much information we'll be getting at this point. Right now, we seem to be in the gap between receiving a passport and entering US immigration (USCIS). We were told to expect at least a week of lag time and haven't heard, yet, if the file has actually been submitted to USCIS. My hope is that we have been and just don't know it yet. ;o)

In the meantime, I've been compiling a list of things we need and need to do before our Asa comes home. I actually purchased some clothes for him online, which made my heart flutter with excitement. I haven't found the perfect homecoming outfit for him yet, though. We might wait and do that as a way to celebrate immigration approval (since that will give us a better idea of when he'll be home and what the weather will be like).

Thank you for all the wonderful and sweet comments on our passport news. It's amazing to be able to share this process with so many supportive friends! We are so grateful for your continued prayers. We're still hoping for the possibility of being on a particular pick-up trip and will certainly be updating the blog as we get more information. Have a fantastic weekend!

It Was Issued!

2009-01-23T23:25:00.004-05:00

We had been waiting all week and I'd given up hope, thinking it was just to late to receive any type of news. But at 9:56 pm Friday night, I saw the e-mail as it entered my in-box!! Asa has a passport! And we are elated!!

Our documents will now be sealed by foreign affairs and, in about a week, they will be submitted to USCIS (US immigration) for approval. Once approved (we're not quite sure how long that will take) a visa appointment is scheduled at the consulate and the actual visa will be issued a few days after that. We are praying for a smooth process and a quick visa approval. Since many C4C families are on the verge of traveling, they are now scheduling group pick-up trips to make it easier on the creche staff. Our fervent prayer is, and has always been, that Asa will come home in God's perfect timing - and of couse, our desire is that his visa will be issued in time for the next trip.

No Passport News Yet...

2009-01-19T10:29:00.004-05:00

But I'm so hopeful for this week. Today is Jim's birthday and what an awesome gift it would be - to find out that the passport had been printed! He did get part of his gift two weeks ago, though... a bike. And somehow, I'm benefiting from the anniversary of his birth, as well, because he got me a bike so we could all ride together. Now we just need our precious three year old son here so we can get one of these for long family rides on the lovely, Florida bike trails:
We're trying really hard to stay busy and enjoy each day. There are a few activities coming up in the next couple of weeks, including a conference at our church with Gary Chapman (author of many wonderful relationship books including the Five Love Languages series). We have a some get-togethers planned with friends and a few home projects we'd like to complete. Hopefully those will be enough of a distraction to help get us through the final stretch of this wait.

Once Asa comes home, our plan is to give him plenty of uninterrupted time alone with us, to lay a very firm foundation of attachment and healthy bonding. So, while I'm still having those impatient feelings of wanting him home NOW, I'm trying to embrace this season of our lives as an opportunity for growth and a time of joyful anticipation. It's hard to make that attitude shift because my arms ache to hold my son and I just want my family together. But I've been doing a study on waiting from different Old Testament passages and am learning (and being reminded of) the benefits of fully experiencing "tough" times and trying to appreciate their ultimate purpose. This is so much easier to talk about that to actually do but we are working on it! And now the little kids and I are off to wrap their gifts for daddy.

Brother and Sisters...

2009-01-12T10:02:00.011-05:00

And a dog.

I'm going through pictures from Christmastime and thought I'd share a few current ones of the three kids who have been waiting so patiently for their little brother. Here is Allyson (16) at Ft. Desoto Beach. We spent Christmas Eve there with my mom and grandparents. It was a beautiful day.

And here are the two littles with Santa and Mrs. Claus. Chloe (7) asked for walkie-talkies. Camden (5) also asked for walkie-talkies, but when Santa said he could pick something different than his sister, he said "a guitar." By the way, that beard is the real deal. We love them and see them every year. {We even ran into Santa down on Siesta Key in the summer.... when the kids seemed suprised to see him in a red polo and shorts, he told them "everyone needs a vacation once in a while" and "you've been good but you should keep your rooms cleaner." See?!?! He IS the real Santa!!}

And I'll add one of the loyal companion whom, we hope, Asa will come to love. Every boy needs a faithful dog. Henry is our sweet Golden Retriever.

Embassy Outfit...

2009-01-11T20:46:00.006-05:00

The children at the crèche are always dressed up so nicely for appointments in Port Au Prince. This outfit will be heading down to Haiti next week - I'm sending it so Asa has something brand new to wear when he has his embassy appointment. I think he'll look super handsome. We are praying for passport news so our file can move on to the final phase: US immigration. As always, your prayers are extremely appreciated! We've been receiving so much encouragement from friends and family who are almost as eager to get him home as we are. We feel truly blessed by the amazing support we've received through this whole journey and are looking forward to introducing the little boy that so many people have grown to love.

Oh, and three children from the crèche are coming home to their family this week! :o)

Back To Work...

2009-01-07T09:52:00.006-05:00

I think this is the day that many of the Haitian offices reopen. I read on another orphanage's blog that some offices were working with a limited staff over the holidays - it would be nice if the passport office was one of them. We're assuming it'll be a few more weeks before we get news, though.

Christmas break kept us busy. We were finishing up Asa's US immigration forms, as well as compiling the current support documentation that they require to issue his visa. One funny/frustrating thing is that, at the same time, we were also working on Allyson's visa application for Brazil. She'll be going on her third mission trip to Curitiba over spring break and their visa application process has become more complex with each passing year. It was soooo nice to be able to just mail everything off and be done with paperwork.... for a while.

Now that the offices are open, I'm eager to start reading great news on everyone's blogs! :o)

That Smile....

2009-01-03T22:26:00.010-05:00

Look at this gorgeous little boy. These pictures are from the October '08 trip - exactly one year after meeting our precious Asa Mack for the first time. The difference was unbelievable. When I traveled in October of '07, he was extremely ill. He was severely anemic and protein deficient. He could barely keep his eyes open and, for the most part, just slept in my arms. I never saw him smile. Not once. It was heartbreaking and, to be quite honest, I was very scared for him. But the staff in Haiti told me that they had seen this before and they assured me that he would be nursed back to health.

In December of '07, I was already seeing the results of their efforts. He was still low on energy, but the improvement was evident. July of '08 was an answer to so many prayers - Asa seemed to be in perfect health and he amazed me with his physical development and his joy filled spirit. We had so much fun together and were truly able to bond as mother and son... we picked up right back where we'd left off when I returned a few months later.

The particular afternoon that I took these pictures was quite busy. I was helping to photograph some of the children for their monthly updates and it was a little chaotic. Asa was sticking pretty close to my side and I pointed over to the slide to see if he would climb up by himself. He seemed to understand and ran over... looking back every few steps to make sure I was watching. Once he got to the top, he waited to ensure that he had my full attention, then proudly slid down by himself. Now, this is a totally normal thing that my other kiddos have done. It's always so sweet to know that they want to show off for mommy. But to see Asa, the once sick and weak little boy, who could barely make eye contact twelve months before, run - climb - slide - and smile that HUGE smile... and at me. Amazing. Precious. Priceless.

Looking Ahead...

2009-01-01T23:44:00.015-05:00

We're hoping and praying that 2009 will be a better year than the last. We're certainly grateful for the abundant blessings of 2008; we are all healthy, we have a home & food (so much more than many people throughout the world) and we've enjoyed some wonderful moments together as a family. But we've also experienced some sadness and loss...

Last year began with us waiting for Asa.

Then, mid-year, our hearts broke as we mourned the suffering of two precious families. We were shocked and confused by the passing of our Senior Pastor & his son and, three months later, our Music Minister. We trust that they are in the loving embrace of our Heavenly Father, which eases some of the sorrow, but for their wives, children, parents and siblings - we ache.

The trip to Haiti in October (my fourth visit) brought about a ton of sadness and anguish over all the time we are missing with Asa Mackenley - and the desperation to just get him home has, at times, felt like physical pain. So the last few months have been awfully hard. The blog was a bit neglected and has mostly just been an outlet for process updates as opposed to revealing nitty-gritty reality of a family in the throes of Haitian adoption. Now, we're not walking around depressed all the time and we absolutely trust that God has a perfect plan. We do enjoy each and every moment together - but the sense that we are missing a family member is palpable. The three kids at home stay positive by envisioning what life will be like when Asa arrives and they pray for him every day. But I know it's disappointing for them when well-meaning people ask why their brother isn't home yet.

Christmas was, of course, bittersweet. We loved spending time with family, but we missed my brother, sister-in-law and nephew who are in the Netherlands. And we missed our youngest son.

Then the year ended with us... waiting for Asa.

So we're looking forward and embracing 2009 as the year that {we pray} will end with Asa in our home... and not just in our hearts.

Precious Christmas Update Photos...

2008-12-25T21:44:00.002-05:00

Taken by Kristi.

Merry Christmas...

2008-12-24T13:30:00.006-05:00

May it be blessed!!

This is our Chloe, reciting Luke 2:1-14 from memory.

Goodbye, MOI....

2008-12-19T00:05:00.004-05:00

We are OUT! Just in time. The Haitian offices closed today and do not re-open until January 7th. This is the only Christmas gift for which I had been hoping & praying. We're beyond thrilled.

What does this mean? Asa is approved for a passport. The passport printing process can take a few weeks. As far as I know, that wait will not begin until the offices open again in January. Once his passport is printed, our file is submitted to USCIS, where an orphan investigation is performed. I'm uncertain on the time-frame for that one.... sometimes it's weeks, sometimes it's over a month (or longer). Our representatives in Haiti have been working tirelessly, though, and it seems like most families from our orphanage have been on the lower end of that wait. We're incredibly grateful for their diligence! Finally, the visa appointment is scheduled, his visa is issued and we go to pick up our precious little boy!!! We are {finally} just a few short steps away. It's almost unreal to even type that and a part of me is actually a little nervous to do so (because it's international adoption and anything can happen). But we have faith. It's feeling closer.

In other amazing news: FOUR children from Asa's creche came home this week!

Update From Haiti...

2008-12-11T15:39:00.004-05:00

Kristi is visiting her adorable little boy in Haiti right now, and here's her sweet update on Asa:

Asa Mack- He's just him as sweet as ever I played a ton with him and Ko-Lou last night. He points to your photos and says mama!!

Asa's third birthday was last Friday so Kristi was kind enough to take down some little things we had for him. He loves 'ma-chines' so we sent three toy cars, along with some fruit leather (grape - which is always his favorite when I visit) and a mini-photo album of our family. I really hope that he understands, on some level, how much he is loved.

I've talked to a few people recently who said that, out of the blue, they've felt lead to pray for our son. We feel so blessed to have friends and family who continue to hope and pray with us for God's perfect timing in every aspect of Asa's adoption. THANK YOU!! We are truly grateful.

November's Update Photo...

2008-12-04T15:46:00.003-05:00

Is absolutely precious. I'm so disappointed that I already had our Christmas cards printed, because this picture would have been perfect.

He's grown since October. I can tell by the shirt, which is one that I've seen the older boys wear. It says something like "Who needs the lotto, I got grandma!" I'm sure our moms will be thrilled to hear that Asa prefers them to state sanctioned gambling.

Daddy Needs...

2008-11-30T22:28:00.009-05:00

Both of his boys...

For Thanksgiving Day football games,

and for naps.

I can't imagine a better daddy for my two sons. And I can't wait for the day that they're both snuggled up on the couch with my amazing husband.

The righteous man walks in integrity...

Blessed are the sons who come after him.

Proverbs 20:7

Then and Now...

2008-11-25T14:05:00.004-05:00

This is Asa at eighteen months. He was still such a baby.

And here he is at nearly three years old. No longer a toddler.

A year and a half. Gone.

Two Cute Boys...

2008-11-14T21:49:00.003-05:00

I took this video in October. Asa was sharing his bracelet with Kobe. I'm not sure what he was chanting (I would love to know!) but it sure was adorable.

Christmas Gift Idea...

2008-11-14T10:18:00.002-05:00

T-Shirts that benefit orphans in Ethiopia! AHOPE for Children is a non-profit organization whose mission is to serve the children of Ethiopia, with a primary emphasis on caring for orphans infected with HIV.

Click Button For Info:

The shirts are cute and 100% of the proceeds support a really worthy cause. So if you have friends/family members for whom you have a hard time buying, I think this is a gift they would truly treasure.

What We're Reading...

2008-11-10T14:34:00.003-05:00

The Connected Child by Dr. Karyn Purvis. I had seen this book recommended on quite a few adoption and attachment websites so Jim ordered it a few weeks ago. So far, it seems very informative, practical and in-line with many of our existing parenting philosphies.

I was pleased to find a radio interview with the author and thought it might be helpful for other adoptive parents. The interview is an hour long - I listened to it while folding laundry.

Upon finding this interview, I was browsing the other programs in the series relating to adoption and found one focusing on todder adoption, which I enjoyed listening to, as well.

Monthly Update Photos...

2008-11-07T00:00:00.005-05:00

Here are our update photos for October.

We normally get one, much awaited picture with each monthly report. I check my in-box incessantly, looking for a new glimpse of our sweet boy.

These pictures don't come as a huge surprise, though, because.... I took them. ;o)

Sometimes, traveling families will help out by taking the monthly pictures. Another mom (April, who handles C4C donations and came up with the amazing food drive idea) and I took some fun autumn props and tried to elicit smiles** from the children at the creche. Asa's not a huge fan of the camera and it was hard for me to get any good grins out of him, but he sure does look handsome in the Redskins Jersey (which used to be Camden's).

I just have to do this, too:

WOOOO HOOOOO!

I don't think I had fully expressed my joy over the whole MOI thing in the last post. I was in a hurry but wanted to share our news so I only wrote a quick blurb. We're really excited about this forward motion and it will certainly make our holidays a little bit brighter. Thank you so much for all the sweet comments - it really means a lot to know that others (many of whom we've never "met") share our happiness!

**Trail mix and gummi bear bribes might have been involved.

Oh, Happy Day...

2008-11-05T14:25:00.001-05:00

We just got word that our file was submitted into MOI.

;o)

No Word On MOI...

2008-11-03T10:56:00.007-05:00

Nuthin'.

I had really, really hoped that I'd get some news while I was in Haiti, but as of October 24th, we were yet to be submitted. It does seem like things are moving pretty quickly once files get into MOI, though, and we're hoping to ride that wave. There are quite a few children who are very close to coming home in the next few weeks, which is fabulous news! Just imagining what it'll feel like when we finally get "the call" makes my heart race.

The kids' anticipation is reaching a new level. While all three kiddos have been eager to get Asa home, our little Camden talks about it all the time. His mealtime & bedtime prayers always include lengthy requests about Asa's health & happiness, the adoption process, the Haitian government and all the orphans in Haiti. Both boys have birthdays in early December (Cam will be five, Asa will be three) and back before our eight month stint in IBESR, we thought Asa would be home by then. Cam had been really excited about the possibility of a joint birthday party. But now, he's been asking if he'll still be five when Asa comes home. And I want to say "of course he'll be home before you turn six!" but we've come to realize that there are no guarantees and refuse to make promises to our kids when we simply don't know.

BUT... It does feel like we're actually nearing what could be the home-stretch of this wait. I'm starting to think about things we should buy (a big armoire for the boys' room, a new stroller, etc...) and Jim has been checking on prices for last-minute flights to Haiti - just to get an idea of what it might be when we do travel. The uncertainty of Haitian adoption totally sucks the fun out of what should be excitement. It's been about six months since I've had much hope or joy (in terms of the adoption process). And it stinks! So I might be misguided in my assumption that Asa could be home early next year and I might just have my hopes dashed if we hit more insane delays. But whatever. I'm fed up with fear and anxiety and am just going to look forward to what will be one of the most exciting moments for our family: the day Asa comes home.

Pictures...

2008-10-28T11:40:00.004-04:00

These are some of the food bins that arrived in Haiti with us:

My silly spaghetti boy...

2008-10-28T09:00:00.002-04:00

The food arrives at the Creche...

Next Time I Go To Haiti...

2008-10-25T22:03:00.005-04:00

I can't come home alone. I think four visits is enough. I'm hesitant to say that because I love Haiti and I love the Creche, but this trip was particularly draining because Asa is getting older and is understanding more. I know he remembered our visit in July and how I had to leave him. He would cry when I'd take him back to the aunties at bedtime, and handing him over Friday morning was gut-wrenching. I don't ever want leave him again so we're hoping and praying that this lengthy process will be over by the first quarter of next year.

The trip, itself, went smoothly. After a few months of delays, the 84 tubs of food from the C4C box drive were on our plane and eventually made it to the Creche. Getting them out of the airport was interesting (and unexpected since we thought they were going to sit in customs for a few days). But we had and awesome group and everyone pulled together. Amber from C4C, April and her husband Mike (adopting Darline) worked really hard to make the whole thing happen and found favor with almost everyone they encountered (airport personnel, customs agents...).

The village road was noticeably washed out from the flooding which made the the ride.... bumpier. ;o) There is a new live-in director at the Creche and she seems to have things running smoothly. The children are looking so healthy and seem happy. It felt hotter than it had been last October but the evenings were lovely and the children have so much fun playing outside before dinner.

Asa's monthly reports have been accurate. He has definitely gained 3+ pounds since July. He now has a belly to match those chubby cheeks. He talks a lot - I can understand and speak a little bit of baby-Kreyol. He remembered a lot of the toys/books I brought back from last time and enjoyed carrying around his mini tote bag filled with crayons, stickers and sunglasses. He loved to be carried and did not love to be put down (definitely my child). He cuddled up and slept on top of me for a nap which it was sweaty for both of us, but I was in heaven. I think I've mentioned this before, but napping with a toddler is total bliss for me. Oh, and Asa has the BEST LAUGH EVER. Here are a few pictures from the trip. More to come in the next few days...

Asa's New Poster...

2008-10-18T23:19:00.006-04:00

All the children at the creche have family photos over their beds, and I take a new poster for Asa each time I visit. This one is special because it was made by my super-amazing-brother-in-law, Gary. Isn't it cute?

Gary arrived today (he lives in Maryland) and is going to hang out with Jim & the kids while I'm gone. In addition to being a really cool poster-making uncle, Gary is a Haiti adoption expert. Seriously. He knows the terms IBESR, Parquet, Second Legal and MOI. He even uses them in the proper context. :o)

Thank you, Gary - I know Asa is going to love it!!

Four Kids... Two Weeks... Eighty Tubs...

2008-10-07T20:02:00.003-04:00

Four children from Asa's orphanage are coming home to their families this week (three sisters came home just a few weeks ago, too). What's especially exciting is that I've traveled with their parents on past trips so I'm incredibly thrilled for all of them. This gives us such a sense of hope: children do come home... eventually.

I'll be in Haiti with the littlest Pie in TWO WEEKS! One cool thing about the upcoming trip is that we'll be escorting the 80 tubs of food (from the box drive a few months ago) to the orphanage. It was actually scheduled to fly to Haiti in August, then rescheduled for September but the hurricanes and flooding caused numerous delays. So the food will be on our plane and will {somehow} be hauled to the orphanage - where we will help to unpack, sort and store it. The final count includes FIVE months worth of formula, hundreds of cans of fruits/veggies/tuna/peanut butter and massive amounts of rice & beans. This supply is crucial as food costs continue to be insane in Haiti and some types of items can't be purchased at all.

I'm getting so excited. It's kind of weird to imagine that one whole year ago, I was preparing for my very first trip to meet Asa. I never would have imagined that twelve months later, our little guy would still be in Haiti and I'd be making my fourth trip to see him. Wow. But what a blessing those precious visits have been.

Monthly Update... Already!

2008-10-04T00:37:00.008-04:00

I wasn't expecting it so soon since it seems like we just received the last one. But, SURPRISE! After a busy Friday afternoon, we came home to find a new picture and a GOOD report from Haiti.

Look at how big he is - - 27 pounds!! Our teeny-tiny-little-guy is finally growing. This is huge news since Asa had been hovering in the low 20's for nearly a year. He has gained four pounds in the past two months. I purchased a few outfits for my upcoming trip back in August. It's funny because, even in Florida, they start stocking fall/winter clothes and I knew it was my last chance to buy shorts & summery stuff. The clothes I bought (based on his size in late July) might just be a little snug!

Now the really EXCITING news:

The status of our file is now listed as "in preparation to enter MOI." We've been told that it means we are either out of Second Legal or are very close to being released. Either way, this means we have an adoption decree (!!!!!) and supporting documents that have been authenticated, registered and certified. So, in Haiti's eyes, Asa is our SON! There is a bit of a lag time before entering MOI, though... it can be up to six weeks. I think this is because the file is heavily scrutinized in MOI and they are making sure there are no errors before its submission. But still - - this is progress. MOI is the last step of the Haitian process and it is currently averaging two to three months. After an MOI exit, the final step is US immigration.

I'm not ready to predict when Asa will come home. I'm not even willing to ball-park it because anything can happen. But our family has been praying some very specific prayers about God's timing in all of this and we're trusting that Asa will come home at just the right time. We've already seen some pretty miraculous things, timing-wise, and believe that there is a plan and a design beyond our own comprehension.

New Update Photo...

2008-09-24T23:12:00.005-04:00

We received this picture today:

And I played around with it:

Playing Around With Photo Editing Programs...

2008-09-22T13:44:00.004-04:00

Just for fun - - since we're done with homeschooling for the day.

Unintentional Blog Sabbatical...

2008-09-16T20:14:00.014-04:00

So it's been a while. Initially, I hadn't been posting because we simply didn't have much adoption news to share. We're still in Second Legal which seems to be slow right now and I haven't heard about much (if any) movement lately. Then, the storms started hitting. In light of the devastation taking place in Haiti, I felt like anything I might post about it would seem trite and couldn't really convey our deep concern and sadness over the suffering there. This past week, I was thinking about how I really needed to update the blog, but we were enjoying a visit with my brother, sister-in-law and precious nephew - so I never got around to it. Now that I've listed my excuses for the huge gap between posts, here are some updates...

We received Asa's monthly report (no picture yet) and he has gained 3 pounds and grown 3 centimeters since I visited at the end of July. I'd like to think the spurt was from the extra love he got when I was there but I guess a lot of it might have to do with an unreliable scale at the orphanage. ;o) He is growing, though, and we're thrilled. The update also said that he is polite and is becoming more verbal; he knows and calls all his friends by name. He was starting to do that when I visited but I'm sure his vocabulary has increased exponentially since it just explodes at this stage. It hurts so much to think about missing all this: new words, potty training, cuddling up together and reading board books.... I love everything about toddlers. Asa will be three in December. I'm missing it all.

While I'm on the subject of what we're missing, I was reminded this week of what Asa will be missing. Regardless of when he comes home to us, it won't be until at least 2010 that he'll meet his uncle, aunt and little cousin. I was still clinging to hope, even up until early this year, that Asa would be home before October... my brother and his family leave in two weeks for Amsterdam as church planting missionaries. Their plan is to live in The Netherlands for five years with a short furlow mid-way through. We are so excited about the work they'll be a part of, but there's definitely an element of sadness in knowing that my brother won't be here when our son comes home. We said goodbye yesterday, after one last visit, and it'll be Skype for the next few years...

Finally (wow, this got long after nearly a month between posts) Asa's orphanage weathered the first of the storms pretty well. But last week, we received news that the White River did end up flooding the village and the road was, essentially, washed out. Food was being carried in via donkey and there has been some damage to the generator so candles were being used at night. We haven't gotten a more recent report, but our hope is that the water has receded and things are returning to normal. [UPDATE as of 9/18: it is still raining quite a bit in the evenings and the village is still flooded.] Please pray for the children of the Crèche Enfant de l’Jèsus and the people in the surrounding village of Ti Mache. Here are some pictures:

The gate into the orphanage compound: water covered the road and came up to the wall.

The road to the crèche looks more like a rushing river.

Ending this post on a happy note: I'll be there in five weeks.

Our Sweet Little Boy...

2008-08-22T14:54:00.012-04:00

Is in an orphanage right now and has no idea how loved he is. Asa needs us and we need him. Haiti is only a little over two hours away by plane and that fact, if I dwell on it long enough, truly breaks my heart.

Last summer, we thought he'd be home by now. Early this year, we thought for sure he'd be here in time for Christmas. Right now, I would like to think that it'll be early 2009. But in all honesty - we just don't know. Here's the timeline thus far:

Decided we would someday adopt from Haiti - summer 2000
"We're really doing this..." picked agency - February 2007
Homestudy - March 2007
Matched with Asa - June 2007
Dossier sent to Haiti - August 2007
File enters IBESR - September 21st, 2007
My first trip to Haiti - October 2007
My second trip to Haiti - December 2007
Files exits IBESR - May 28th, 2008
File enters Parquet - June 2008
My third trip to Haiti - July 2008
File exits Parquet - August 2008
File enters Second Legal - August 2008
Fouth Haiti Trip scheduled - October 2008 (wooo-hoooo!!)

Since we still have a significant wait ahead (Second Legal, MOI and USCIS) I'll be making another trip in October - exactly one year from my first visit. Super excited about seeing my boy again & giving him lots of love. Not at all looking forward to the goodbye. :o(

Monthly Report...

2008-08-16T21:49:00.006-04:00

We received our update for the month of July. These reports are written up by the preschool teacher, Mr. John, and give us a tiny glimpse of what's been going on with our Asa Mack over the previous month. Here are a few highlights:

Behavior: very gentle
Mood/Emotion: very happy
Other General Changes in last month: This little boy is getting very active and interesting. He plays with his mates fairly.

It also said that he had the chicken pox right before I visited. I knew it had been going around - and a lot of the other toddlers were still covered in calamine lotion while I was there. He didn't seem to have any evidence of recent scabs or even scars so it must have been a fairly mild case. Two down, two to go. Allyson had the pox when she was six, but Chloe and Camden have not. I prefer that my kiddos receive natural & lifelong immunity by actually catching the chicken pox since they are healthy kids (not immune-compromised in any way). I think this is one of the childhood illnesses that actually helps to boost the immune system in the long-run. They haven't been exposed yet, though...

I think I'm finally starting to come out of the post-Haiti funk. I am still missing Asa terribly but we've been trying to stay busy with fun family activities (the kids and I are working on a silly project) and preparing for our (home) school year. Jim and I even have a little get-away planned for just us next weekend. That's something we have not done since before the two littles were born and something we will not be doing for quite some time once Asa comes home. ;o)

We're One Step Closer...

2008-08-12T12:42:00.004-04:00

To bringing Asa home. We found out today that we were signed out of Parquet. There's still quite a wait ahead; more legalizations needed and offices through which our file must pass. But we're encouraged and, if it's possible, we're even more excited about beginning our new life with him.

Missing Him...

2008-08-11T14:44:00.002-04:00

Finally, Some Video...

2008-08-07T20:19:00.004-04:00

Here's Asa, talking about his family. He says everyone's names very well, but Camden usually comes out something like "De-dah-dah." Check out the way he reacts to Henry (our golden retriever) at the end. Most of the children at the orphanage do not like animals. He's no exception and promptly folds up the album and says "no!"

And another...

My Third Trip To Haiti...

2008-08-04T11:32:00.011-04:00

Was, by far, my best visit with our little Asa Mack. He is healthier & happier than ever and has grown in so many ways. He has the sweetest personality; he loves to share, he is gentle and he is SUPER CUDDLY. He really is starting to talk a lot and can say the names of everyone in our family (except Camden, but he does have a special word he uses consistently for Cam). I have a GREAT video of that... it'll be up soon. He talks to all the other toddlers in his room and it's adorable to hear them carry on their little conversations in Creole. I'm still feeling a bit icky from my recent tummy troubles, but here are a few pictures and memories from the trip...

We got in on Tuesday afternoon and this is what our luggage truck looked like:

When I walked into the orphanage, I went straight back to Asa's room where he was dressed up and waiting. The auntie (nanny) told him that I was his mama - he looked at me for a second, then smiled HUGE and came running. He grabbed me around my neck and didn't let go (the same reaction as my second trip). I'm sure he recognized me from the pictures above his bed, but this time, within minutes, he was calling me "mama."

One of the sweetest memories will be cuddling up for a nap with my boy! I LOVE naps and the only thing better than a nap is a nap with a toddler!! Have I mentioned how hot it was? I brought a battery powered table fan for next to the bed. When I turned it on, Asa looked SO confused - - I don't think he's ever felt relief from the stifling summer heat there. He smiled & konked out very soon after laying his head down. I'm glad I had my camera close because I was able to get some precious pictures of him sleeping & holding my hand.

The kids LOVE sunglasses so I brought a pair for him. He loved wearing them atop his head, and especially liked that he matched the picture of Papa and Camden in the new poster I brought.

We spent a lot of time playing with toys I brought. I had a little canvas bag for him and he loved carrying his books and treats in it. He was also happy just hanging out on my lap while I enjoyed visiting with other parents on the trip.

The aunties really seem to love him and loved showing off the fact that he can recite some sort of rhyme they taught him. I have no idea what it means but they had him do it over and over and smiled with pride each time he did. The auntie on the right in this photo told me that she loved him and she loves me - I responded that I loved her as well, and then we agreed we are "fanmi" (family).

My favorite time of day is right after the sun sets and everything turns a pinkish-purple. I didn't get any good photos this time, but even if I did, I doubt a photo would do the color justice. This was taken a little too early.

Anyone who has been to Haiti knows that you can't leave the country without leaving behind a little piece of your heart. There's no way to fully describe the shocking poverty or the tremendous beauty. I think most people (especially in the US) don't realize that those, seemingly opposite qualities, can coexist. Anyway, I'm sure I'll remember more in the days to come. It's always a hard transition from Haiti to home.

Quick and Easy Weight Loss Solution:

2008-08-04T09:52:00.002-04:00

Go to Haiti
Assume that "only a small taste" of the yummy, spicy coleslaw and one tiny cucumber slice won't make you sick
Come home
Endure two days of multiple digestive ailments
CONGRATULATIONS!! You've just lost five pounds!!

I do have a lot of pictures, video and stories to share. I'm feeling much better today, so I'll definitely be posting more soon. I have to give a shout out to my sweet hubby who, not only took great care of the kids while I was gone, but has also been cooking, cleaning and entertaining our house guests while I've been sick. Thank you, J!!

He's Getting SO Big...

2008-08-02T10:12:00.003-04:00

I'll post about the trip (with tons of photos) later. Just wanted to say that I'm home safely and the trip was fantastic. Asa Mack is looking super healthy and is very happy. He has the greatest smile & laugh and he's TALKING!

Heading Out...

2008-07-28T08:51:00.002-04:00

And I should be back Friday evening. M'ale na wè pita (goodbye, see you later)!!

Asa's New Poster...

2008-07-22T10:53:00.006-04:00

That I'll be putting over his bed in ONE WEEK! I actually spent most of today in the balmy Florida air (93°F - 89% humidity) and forced myself to stay outside as long as possible without surrendering and running back into the house for A/C. I think this pre-Haiti therapy might alleviate some of the shock from the oppressive summer heat once I get there. I'll let you know if it works. I also started my new anti-malarial pills today. I had a terrible reaction after my second dose of the Chloroquine last year so I'm taking an alternative, Doxycycline. The doctor who treated me said that medication allergies usually appear after that second dose, which is why I've started taking this daily pill a little early. I was supposed start only two days before departing but I really don't want to risk a crazy reaction in Haiti.

Our "adoption process news" isn't very rosy. There are rumors that Parquet (where our file is currently parked) will be closed from August-October. We don't have much reliable information as to whether they will continue to process files already the office, if they will just set them aside during the closure or if this whole thing is just misinformation. And, surprise, surprise - - UNICEF has been mentioned as one of the possible reasons (read this if you aren't familiar with UNICEF's involvement in keeping orphans from loving families).

We would be so grateful for any prayers you'll offer up for this situation. There are so many loving families who are anxiously awaiting the homecoming of their precious children. There are so many children who need to be with their families and not in orphanages. It's hard to make sense of a system that just doesn't seem to care. We just keep praying.....

Updating...

2008-07-14T20:49:00.004-04:00

I've been told (by a more than a few people) that the blog needs an updated post. I was trying to keep the food drive info there at the top for a while, just because it is such an important cause. I'm happy to say that Chances for Children has received an amazing response to this effort and a lot of food will be heading down to the Crèche. There's still time to send a box, though. The deadline to ship them is this Friday.

We received Asa's monthly report recently and he's doing really well. He has gained some weight and is now up to 23 pounds! Here are a few cute excerpts:

Behavior: he has very good manners

Mood / Emotion: he is getting very happy and smiling

Other General Changes in last month: he looks much brighter in any kind of his room activities

Special events: his language skill is developing out well

He plays with his mates fairly.

I'll be with him in exactly TWO WEEKS!!

Want To Help??

2008-07-06T01:20:00.002-04:00

I know many people who read this blog are also adopting from Haiti (or other countries). Feel free to stop reading this post now because you already do so much for your kids and their orphanages. Right now, I'm appealing specifically to others who want to help orphans in a tangible way. The organization that runs Asa's crèche, Chances For Children, happens to have a connection with Crocs (the shoe company). Soles United is a division of Crocs that takes donated shoes and recycles them into new ones, which they donate to needy people around the world. Later this month, they will be taking 10,000 pairs of shoes to Haiti! The great news for us is that there will be extra room for cargo on the flight that's transporting the shoes. Crocs is donating that space so crucial food & supplies can be taken to the orphanage. Currently, many of the needed items (formula, medications) are hand-carried by traveling families. This is an amazing opportunity to get a large quantity of food to our kids. You can click the flyer to enlarge. Feel free to print it and give it to anyone who might be interested in helping. If you want to take part, please e-mail me at waitingforasa@yahoo.com so there will be an accurate count of boxes being mailed.

Thank you SO MUCH!

* The formula listed is Kirkland (Costco's brand) but Enfamil can be substituted if necessary.

Butter... Parkaaaayyyy...

2008-07-02T15:33:00.001-04:00

Found out today that we've definitely been submitted into Parquet. I'm not sure when we went in, but should get the exact date with our next monthly report. I do know that we won't get OUT until a they receive a few additional documents for our file. I finally received those today - they'll be translated by a friend and should be headed down to Haiti next week. We're hearing that Parquet is going a bit more smoothly, but now, files are being held up in Second Legal. I don't even think I could make an educated guess as to when we'll be out due to all the variables (and in Haiti, even the variables vary from one day to the next).

I tried to find the old Parkay commercial from when I was little because that's what I always think of when someone says "Parquet." This was the closest thing I could find. ;o)

Asa Mack

2008-07-01T02:13:00.001-04:00

If you listen closely, he says "Mama Daddeee" twice.

I tried to edit the post below and the video vanished.

We Can't Stop Watching It!!

2008-07-01T01:00:00.001-04:00

The video above was taken by Kristi (mommy to the adorable Kobe). Thank you, Kristi!! I can't wait to kiss those sweet cheeks!

Nine Years...

2008-06-26T12:58:00.006-04:00

*you can make your own library catalog card here*

Walk By Faith

Lunch Date With My Big Boy...

Asa-isms: Part III

Wheels...

Pool Pictures...

Swimming in March & Locs Update...

More Asa Quotes:

Asa: It's dangerous to run in the road 'cause a car could squash you flat like a scarecrow.Me: Scarecrows are flat?Asa: Yes, if they get squashed by a car.

Asa: Mom, are you going to wear that?Me: (in what I thought was a cute jogging suit) Yes, why?Asa: Because I'll be embarrassed.Me: WHY?Asa: Because it looks like pajammies and people are going to laugh at you.

"Asa, what do you want for Christmas?""An iPad."

Four Years Ago...

Hair!

One Month...

Hair Update...

Asa-isms...

A Quick Update & Some News...

Asa's Baby Locs...

Attachment & Behavior Stuff...

This Is What Happens...

Strangers...

One Year: The Good, The Bad & The Funny...

Three Years Ago...

C4C Earthquake Relief...

Sometimes I Wonder...

In the Midst of Such Sorrow...

As 2009 Ends...

Reunion Recap...

C4C Family Reunion!!!

6+ Months and a Long Update...

Asa: Singer/Songwriter

Our Little Tadpole...

Lazy Siesta Key...

4+ Months Home...

Fun With Pronouns

Our Son...

We've Been Busy...

Asa's Been Home For TWO MONTHS!

Brothers...

Sand And Sun...

The Scary Monster...

An Update:

Spring In Florida {Alternate Title: Beach Baby}

"Bank You, Mommmmmmy"

It's Hard To Believe...

Potty Time Fun...

Build-A-Bear

Family Pictures...

Not Much Time...

Some Pictures From The Trip...

Papa and Asa

We're Home...

He's Coming Home!!!

It Gets Better (Kind Of)...

We Interrupt This Blog...

USCIS APPROVAL!!!

Missing My Littlest Valentine...

Monthly Update Photo...

This Is Not "The" News...

Well...

It Was Issued!

No Passport News Yet...

Brother and Sisters...

Embassy Outfit...

Back To Work...

That Smile....

Looking Ahead...

Precious Christmas Update Photos...

Merry Christmas...

Goodbye, MOI....

Update From Haiti...

November's Update Photo...

Daddy Needs...

Then and Now...

Two Cute Boys...

Christmas Gift Idea...

What We're Reading...

Monthly Update Photos...

Oh, Happy Day...

No Word On MOI...

Pictures...

Asa: It's dangerous to run in the road 'cause a car could squash you flat like a scarecrow.
Me: Scarecrows are flat?
Asa: Yes, if they get squashed by a car.

Asa: Mom, are you going to wear that?
Me: (in what I thought was a cute jogging suit) Yes, why?
Asa: Because I'll be embarrassed.
Me: WHY?
Asa: Because it looks like pajammies and people are going to laugh at you.

"Asa, what do you want for Christmas?"
"An iPad."